Conversations with a Cowboy

Posted on August 7, 2015 by prairiemoonquilts in Quotes

Being a quilter, it’s quite appropriate that My Cowboy keeps me in stitches, right?

He’s a very quick wit, and a really funny guy, so there’s constant laughter going on around here.

He says: “I give you so much blog fodder, and you won’t even use it!” To which I have to respond: “Well, over half of what you say isn’t repeatable in polite company!”

Recently, we were on a road trip together, and while I’m usually the one driving, this time, My Cowboy was behind the wheel, leaving me floundering restlessly in the passenger seat with nothing to do, so . . .

I decided to interview him!

I was busily jotting down some of the questions I wanted to ask him in my notebook, when he inquires, “Whatcha scribblin’ over there?”

“Interview questions.”
“Who you interviewin’?”
“You!”
“ME? What for?”
“For my blog.”
“The blog?! This sounds more like a setup than an interview!”

“It’ll be OK,” I assured him. “My readers are gonna wanna know the answers to these burning questions. In fact, I wanna know some of the answers my ownself!”

“Hmpf. OK, let’s get on with it. Yer burnin’ daylight.”

bluescotbo

So I settled in with my pen and paper, and fired off my first question, as he drove us on down the road . . .

Me: “What’s your favorite color?”
Him: “Red and orange.”
Me: “OK. I guess I’ll let you have two. If I ask you the same question a year from now, will it change?”
Him: “No.”

Me: “How old were you when you first rode a horse?”
Him: ” 3 or 4. I had my own pony — Rebel.”
Me: “What color was he?”
Him: “Kind of a chestnut.”

Me: “Have you ever jumped on a trampoline?”
Him: “No.”

Me: “Left or right?”
Him: “Left.”

Me: “Have you ever not had a mustache?”
Him: “Well, up until about 8th grade.”

shorty4

Me: “Who was your childhood hero?”
Him: “John Wayne and Mickey Mantle.”
Me: “OK. I guess I’ll let you have two of those, too.”

Me: “How old were you when you competed in your first rodeo?”
Him: “11 or 12.”
Me: “Did you win?”
Him: “I got second place.”
Me: “In what event?”
Him: “Buckin’ ponies. But my most memorable rodeo was the one where I got to kiss Tanya Tucker. We were both just young whippersnappers. She was there to perform and sing, and I was there to ride the wild horses. And I got to see Mac Davis at the Cattle Congress. He sings my theme song: ‘Oh, Lord, it’s hard to be humble‘.”

andtheroff

Me: “What’s your favorite flavor of ice cream?”
Him: “Praline pecan.”

Me: “Can you swim?”
Him: “Yes.”

Me: “Paper or plastic?”
Him: “Plastic.”

Me: “What was your first vehicle?”
Him: “A 1973 green and white 3-on-the-tree Chevy pickup.”

Me: “What’s your favorite number?”
Him: “7.”
Me: “Why?”
Him: “‘Cause it was Mickey Mantle’s number, and it was my baseball number my whole baseball career from peewee to semi-pro.”

SnChip

Me: “Are you an Elvis fan?”
Him: “Yes.”
Me: “What’s your favorite Elvis song?”
Him: “My Way.”
Me: “Naturally.”

Me: “What’s your favorite food?”
Him: “If I could go back and forth between cheese enchiladas and beef enchiladas, I reckon I could eat Mexican food the rest of my life.”

Me: “What’s your favorite condiment?”
Him: “Trojan XL.”
Me: “Very funny.”
Him: “I reckon it’d be sour cream or parmesan cheese.”
Me: “OK. I guess I’ll let you have two of those, too.”

Me: “Bacon or sausage?”
Him: “Bacon.”

Me: “What’s your favorite outdoor temperature?”
Him: “69.”
Me: “But, of course.”

bluehelpin

Me: “Ford, Chevy, or Dodge?”
Him: “I’ve had some good Fords, but I sure would like me a Dodge.”

Him: “Yes, I like sex.”
Me: “You’re not sposed to be answerin’ questions I didn’t even ask.”
Him: “But you gotta ask the hard questions if you’re gonna be an investigative reporter!”

Me: “Can you dance?”
Him: “Depends.”
Me: “On what?”
Him: “My desire and the music.”
Me: “What music would you prefer to dance to?”
Him: “Sumthin’ slow and easy so we can bump buckles.”

Me: “What’s your favorite movie quote, other than the one you used on me at the beginning?”
Him: “If you don’t quit now, what will you have to regret the rest of your life?”

Me: “Montana, Nebraska, or Idaho?”
Him: “If I can only pick one, I’d probly hafta pick Montana.”

hossNE

Me: “What’s your favorite movie?”
Him: “‘Red River’ or ‘The Cowboys’, or anything with Julianne Moore . . . or Salma Hayek. I think Julianne and Salma should do a movie together. Then it would be my favorite.”

Me: “Plain, chocolate, or strawberry milk?”
Him: “Strawberry.”

Me: “Pie or cake?”
Him: “Depends — could it be banana and butterscotch pie mixed together? If not, then I don’t want either one.”

Me: “How much farther we got to go?”
Him: “‘Bout an hour. There’s a sign for the Grand River. What if I get down here, and I don’t think this river’s so grand? Who do I talk to?”
Me: “Your congressman, I guess.”

S&SNE

Me: “What’s your favorite tractor?”
Him: “Case IH.”
Me: “You’re sposed to say Allis Chalmers.”
Him: “I didn’t know I’s sposed to lie on the survey.”

Me: “Have you ever been in jail?”
Him: “You mean to stay or to visit?”
Me: “I mean you yourself incarcerated.”
Him: “I have been threatened, but never caught.”
Me: “What were you doing to get threatened?”
Him: “I better plead the 5th on that one.”

Me: “Is there anything else you’d like my readers to know about you?”
Him: “I was a genius at a young age. I was born smart. It’s not just sumthin’ you fall into.”
Me: “Hilarious! Do you have any sage advice you’d like to offer my readers?”
Him: “Always have a plan.”

And he does . . .

wornout2

13 responses to “Conversations with a Cowboy”

  1. Cindy says:

    Okay first of all Molly is feeling really left out since there are only pics of Blueberry! And, what happens if you throw Wyoming in there, is it still Montana?

  2. Maxine says:

    What an awesome interview! đŸ™‚ My husband is the same way.. we’ve been married for 30 years. And we still crack each other up!

  3. Rose Marie says:

    I can’t imagine my lineman answering such questions with such flair. He would start exaggerating and he would have to plead the 5th on a lot more of those. But too late. I already know some of the stories. He opens up after a few beers. But I think it is better for his children and grandchildren if they just don’t know. So the Cowboy gets a prize for articulaton.

  4. Patti says:

    OMG that was awesome & hilarious!! Thanks for sharing!!

  5. Mary says:

    That was great! I hope it encourages others to ask questions of those they love.

  6. Diane Jarvis says:

    Ha ha! My Scott is jealous because he has only had his beard since he was 18!

  7. Susan says:

    He’s a Gen-U-Wine crack up. =) I enjoyed that, and I like his plan at the end. So was the river grand or is your congressman hearing from the Cowboy?

  8. Judy Smith says:

    That is one funny man. I always enjoy hearing some of your quotes from him.

  9. Sue Hook says:

    Cute! He’s a hoot!

  10. Anne Wilkins says:

    Love the interview!

  11. Virginia Smith says:

    Enjoyed! It is fun to have him answer the phone. Do this again.

  12. I was chuckling as I was reading – thanks!

  13. I was chuckling as I was reading – thanks! Reminds me of Ree Drummond interviewing Ladd. Those cowboys – so special.

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